Peter Wolf: Come As You Are

Artist: Peter Wolf
Title: Come As You Are
Acquired: Early 1990s from a cut-out bin
Rating: 5/10

This album comes from the peak of the "pop star" portion of Peter Wolf's lengthy recording career. The clues are everywhere: Top 20 hit title track? Check. Synthesizers? Check. Music videos? Check. Liner note pictures showing Peter Wolf in various degrees of shirtlessness? Check. This actually all works reasonably well for what it is, but seeing the formerly goateed J. Geils Band frontman, who once recorded covers of John Lee Hooker and Otis Rush numbers, striking a pop pose is at least moderately incongruous and unsettling, kind of like going on an African safari and seeing a giraffe wearing a bow tie and bowler hat.

That said, the songs here really aren't too bad. Occasionally things get snarled up by the production, as on Blue Avenue, which is drowned in breathy synthesizer faux-vocals, or on Thick as Thieves, featuring a guitar lick that would be pretty exciting if it didn't sound like it were being played to a metronome by a robot.

The lyrics are a hoot - most of the songs here feature either pithy couplets occasionally reminiscent of Mother Goose, or at times a collection of single words or short phrases. There are exceptions, but the cumulative effect suggests that Wolf was to be paid by the word, and a memo came from Accounting that costs would need to be kept down for the next few months in order to meet the third quarter projections.

I know, I'm saying that like it's a bad thing. There's nothing necessarily wrong with lyrics being childlike - certainly nobody can accuse Wolf of being unnecessarily arty or pretentious. A small sampling of the nursery rhymes found here:

"Times Square
Odd pairs
Red glare
Gotta beware"
- Wind Me Up

"Young and innocent
Innocent for love
Young and restless
Restless for love"
- Mamma Said

"Butchers walking down the street
Thinking I'm a piece of meat
Like to hang me on a hook
Cut me up and call the cook"
- Thick As Thieves

"Cyclorama
Melodrama
And, hey, let's face it, we'd been drinkin', too"
- Love On Ice

"I got caught in a blind man's bluff
Feeling like the odd man out"
- Can't Get Started

All in all, I like this album, even while it fails to amaze or inspire. When I listen to it, I am left mildly entertained (you can quote me on that when the remaster is issued - "Mildly entertaining, raves RDConz!"). So I'm giving it a rating right in the middle of my arbitrary numerical spectrum: 5/10.

Stiff Little Fingers: The Peel Sessions

Artist: Stiff Little Fingers
Title: The Peel Sessions
Acquired: Early 1990s, probably from The Exclusive Company or B-Side Records
Rating: 4/10

While I rate it slightly better, I would say this CD is actually less necessary than the Adam and the Ants Peel Sessions CD I reviewed a while back. What this CD consists of is mostly inferior versions of non-rarities, so the question becomes "why own it at all?"

There are 3 sessions of 4 songs each on this CD, sequenced in chronological order. We start with four Inflammable Material tracks recorded in 1978, which are then followed by eight Nobody's Heroes tracks recorded in 1979 and 1980. Of these sets, my favorite is the middle four songs. I think the performances and songs are pretty good from that session. It also features the only somewhat-rarity on the disc, an early version of Nobody's Hero with inferior rough-draft lyrics. It's a shame the final revision had not taken place prior to this recording, because this is actually one of two songs on here that I feel are (or would otherwise be) superior to the official album versions. I've never liked the way Jake Burns sang the album version of Nobody's Hero (my wife said she thought it sounded like he was belching - I agree with this assessment. Plus I have some problems with the mixing).

The other song that benefits from a different performance is Doesn't Make it All Right. Again, the vocal performance here is superior to the album version, as the vocals on the final verse are less obnoxiously melodramatic.

Other than that, there's not anything here that you would need to hear if you already owned the first two albums (plus the Straw Dogs single, which is one of the better performances here, but not quite as fiery as the single version). The rendition of Suspect Device may be of interest if you (perhaps justifiably) hate the sound quality of the other recordings, but while it is better in some ways, I think I still prefer the other versions - even the single version that sounds like it was recorded on a portable tape recorder.

So, while this is an ok (not great) CD, it doesn't have much of a purpose. I'm giving it a 4/10.

Wire: The Drill

Artist: Wire
Title: The Drill
Acquired: Late 1990s, Best Buy cutout bin
Rating: 2/10

"This collection of recordings represent an exploration of 'DUGGA' - i.e. monophonic monorhythmic repetition."

Some things are best left unexplored. What we have here is not so much an exploration of "monophonic monorhythmic repetition" as it is nine recordings of the same song. Specifically, "Drill," which had originally appeared on Wire's Snakedrill EP some five years earlier. What we also have here is an unfortunate, but fortunately rare, instance of Wire looking back instead of ahead.

Things open promisingly enough, with In Every City?, an imaginative, varied take on Drill good enough to stand on its own merits. It's all downhill from there, and not in the good way. Of the remaining eight tracks, only Do You Drive? (Turn Your Coat) holds any lasting interest for me, thanks mostly to the line "What's your quote? / Do you vote? / Do you turn, or does your coat?," which I find amusing (I should probably point out that the lyrics for Drill and its various decendants consist mostly of a series of questions, left unanswered).

Tracks 2-4 and 9 are vaguely interesting for the first listen or so. Tracks 6-8 are music to fall asleep to, although track 7 could have a future as background music for a commercial in which Sam Neill, resplendent in an expensive, well-tailored suit, looks directly into the camera and talks about the internet or blade servers or something like that. I should be on Madison Avenue.

I was curious to see how the Wire A List voters collectively ranked songs from this disc. Here's how they ranked them:

22 In Every City (track 1)
46 What's Your Desire? (track 2)
49 A Chicago Drill (track 9)
58 A Berlin Drill (track 4)
60 Turn Your Coat (track 5)
62 Arriving/Staying (track 3)
68 Did You Dugga? (track 7)
71 Where are You Now? (track 8)
74 Jumping Mint (track 6)

I would place Turn Your Coat no worse than third, but other than that I think they did a pretty good job. Anyway, if you haven't figured it out already, this is probably Wire's least essential album - buy anything else by them before you buy this. One point for In Every City and one point for everything else combined gives this effort a 2/10.

Yes: Yesstory

Artist: Yes
Title: Yesstory
Acquired: Early 1990s at the Exclusive Company on Madison's west side
Rating: 6/10

I figure if you were looking to get beaten to a pulp in 1977, all you would have had to do was head to the Roxy in London just as a Pistols gig was letting out, and loudly wax enthusiastic about the world music portion of "Ritual - Nous Sommes Du Soleil" from "Tales of Topographic Oceans" by Yes.

As a child in the early 1980s, I heard "Roundabout" on the radio and loved it. I hadn't heard rock music like this before - so many different sections, woven together into a cohesive structure. Also, it rocked pretty good. And it was so long - like a rock symphony or concerto or something, not merely a rock song. I was fascinated.

I didn't find out for a good ten years or so which group had done that song, though portions of the tune stuck in my memory. When I did find out, I immediately rushed out to buy a CD that contained it. I settled on Yesstory, a two disc career overview of Yes (budget constraints preventing me from purchasing Yesyears, the four disc treatment).

I'm not generally big on "Greatest Hits" type compilations, although they do serve their purpose. I guess that makes me more of an "album guy" than a "singles guy". Especially for a pretentious prog-rock group such as Yes, something is stolen from the tunes when they're removed from whichever grandiose concept album they previously occupied. Context matters. That said, there can be good compilation albums, and bad compilation albums.

My main problem with this particular compilation album is that I suspect the average fan would be just as well off buying "The Yes Album" and "Fragile" as buying this compilation, assuming that two regular Yes albums cost the same as one two-disc compilation Yes album. Six consecutive songs (of 20 total songs) on Yesstory are from those two albums, and for me they constitute the strongest portion of the compilation by far. Leading up to these six songs the only particular highlight is "Survival", and nothing after them is as good (though it's a pretty high standard to meet). Actually, at one point towards the end, the whole thing threatens to careen off a cliff, as we're treated to the Yes-does-disco embarrassment of "Don't Kill The Whale," from the horribly-named album "Tormato" [sic]. It's a wonder they ever recorded again after that travesty.

As for the aforementioned six consecutive quality cuts, my favorite remains "Roundabout," which is still a great song and an extremely excellent performance. The other two tracks from "Fragile" are also very well-played and -composed. I have no doubt it's the best album of Yes' career, even though I haven't heard the other songs on it. Its immediate predecessor, "The Yes Album," suffers only in comparison to "Fragile" - "Yours Is No Disgrace" being the highlight there, although "I've Seen All Good People" is more immediately recognizeable.

After the tracks from those two albums is the 19-minute "Close To The Edge," which is pretty good but not as wonderfully-performed, followed by the 21-minute "Ritual - Nous Sommes Du Soleil," which is about as pretentious and overblown as it sounds. Listening to disc 2, you may feel despair start to creep in when you realise that more than 46 minutes of your life have passed, and you're only four songs in. From there the songs mercifully get shorter, but not particularly good, other than the unusual slide-guitar-drenched "Going For The One" and the huge 1983 hit "Owner Of A Lonely Heart."

All in all this is a pretty descent compilation, but as mentioned I think I would prefer to own "The Yes Album" and "Fragile," and go from there. I wouldn't miss most of the rest of this stuff. 6/10.

The James Gang: Yer' Album

Artist: The James Gang
Title: Yer' Album
Acquired: 2007-ish, Amazon.com
Rating: 6/10

You can thank Alice Cooper for introducing me to the James Gang. I was driving somewhere late at night when Alice played "Lost Woman" on his radio show. I cranked up the volume and soon was hooked on the song. I bought this CD soon after.

Yer' Album is the first album from both the James Gang and Joe Walsh, and it has a definite first album vibe to it - palpable enthusiasm and excitement mixed with a smidgen of clueless inexperience. There are some great moments here - particularly noteworthy are "Take a Look Around", "Collage", and the aforementioned "Lost Woman". There are some half-baked songs - here I would offer "Funk #48" and "I Don't Have the Time". Then there are the items that fall somewhere in the middle - "Stop" has a decent groove but overstays its welcome, and "Fred" is ambitiously arranged, complete with jazz waltz interlude, but has little lasting impact (witness the apparently arbitrary title). There are plenty of mistakes and miscalculations, but the overall venture is redeemed by spontaneity and Walsh's excellent guitar playing. An enjoyable, spirited, uneven album. I dropped the rating from 7/10 to 6/10 while composing this review, but hit skip on your CD player a couple times and you've got an 8/10.

Paul McCartney: Unplugged (The Official Bootleg)

Artist: Paul McCartney
Title: Unplugged (The Official Bootleg)
Acquired: 1990s, used CD store
Rating: 7/10

Paul McCartney was the most naturally gifted musician in the Beatles, and that has always been simultaneously a great strength and weakness. Able to make music-making look effortless, he has succumbed too often in his career to a lack of effort. A natural showoff who clearly loves to perform, but seemingly unable or unwilling to bury his worst ideas, for every "Maybe I'm Amazed" or "Jet" there are about ten "Mary Had a Little Lamb"s or "Bip Bop"s. He clearly enjoys doing what he does, but caveat emptor, it will be left up to you, dear listener, to sort the wheat from the chaff.

So, allow me to step in as your proxy here, and fill you in on Macca's 1991 CD "Unplugged (The Official Bootleg)." This is actually not so bad. Originating from a time when the show was still quite fresh (it had premiered a little more than a year earlier), the CD benefits from the seeming informality of not only the performances, but importantly, the setlist itself - there is a complete absence of "And now here's another one from our latest album" moments. In fact, the newest song here is a cover of the 1971 tune "Ain't no Sunshine."

There are actually a number of things that make this a fairly unique Paul McCartney live album, the least of which is the incidental fact that the performance is "unplugged." Of the seventeen tracks here, there are only six Beatles songs, and McCartney somehow resists the temptation to play "Yesterday," "Let it Be," "The Long and Winding Road," "Hey Jude," or any number of other songs that at some point became considered mandatory at Paul McCartney concerts. The only number here that feels a bit too obvious for an "Unplugged" show is "Blackbird," which we can forgive, because of course it's a great song. Also of note is the intimacy of the performance - the audience seems so quiet and attentive during the show that McCartney actually betrays a bit of fairly understandable nervousness at one point, flubbing the opening line to "We Can Work it Out" and stopping to try to get some additional crowd noise going - this was not the kind of ambience he was so well accustomed to by that time.

If I had to name some highlights from the disk, I would point out covers of "San Francisco Bay Blues" and a spirited "Hi-Heel Sneakers," a rearranged version of "She's a Woman" that drops it a fourth and replaces the stilted backing of the original with a more laid-back approach, and a rendition of "Every Night" that is good enough to overcome a slight case of overarrangement.

But really, the main highlight here is the relative lack of lowlights. I can only really single out the should-have-remained-unheard would-be-charmer "I Lost My Little Girl," and since the performance here is barely over a minute long, it's more of a venial than mortal sin. I can't say there are any truly great moments, and this was surely far more awesome in person than it is on a CD, but the overall vibe here of the excitement of watching a living legend playing songs for the pure fun of it, rather than going through the same rote motions for the umpteen-hundredth time, is quite infectious. You really get the feeling that Paul McCartney could play six more shows of equally high quality to finish out the week without having to repeat a single number. Which gets us back to that whole "effortless" thing I was talking about earlier. This CD is the good kind of effortless Paul. 7/10.

Van Halen: Van Halen

Artist: Van Halen
Title: Van Halen
Acquired: Purchased, mid 2000s from Amazon.com
Rating: 10/10

Here is a CD that shows up, does exactly what it intends to do, and gets out. This thing sounds great for being thirty years old, although I'm not sure if virtuoso tap guitar solos are still considered fresh in 2008. This is one of only two Van Halen CDs in my collection, so I'm not able to really put this within the context of their larger body of work. Everything I've heard and read indicates that the music here is fairly typical of their first six albums, in that this is a collection of surprisingly short songs (more on this later) played as hard rock, yet with excellent pop craftsmanship.

Closer to the hard rock end of things, we kick off with "Runnin' with the Devil," which quickly establishes the template for the Van Halen sound - this is not a quiet-sounding band. This thing sounds like it was recorded in an arena, and even some of the people in the cheap seats would have surely had blood squirting out their ears. Credit producer Ted Templeman for somehow adding the requisite amounts of echo to the recording without turning the whole thing into mud.

Meanwhile, singer David Lee Roth, who is perhaps second only to Liberace in the number of times he has been referred to as "flamboyant," simultaneously exudes vast amounts of ego and charisma, making that first track sound more like an invitation to a keg party than to Satan-worshipping. Which is good, because the song isn't really about Satan-worshipping at all. This isn't that kind of band.

Actually, from the presentation to the lyrics, "we've got erections, and we aren't afraid to use them" is the theme that keeps popping up (sorry) here, whether it's exhortations to "show your love" on "I'm the One," the gasps and squeals that punctuate their arrangement of "You Really Got Me," or the leering cover of John Brim's "Ice Cream Man." Even the instrumental is called "Eruption." Not that I hold this singular focus against them, even if things tend a perhaps a little too much towards the sophomoric at times - few bands could objectify women with this much style.

Also, do not think at this point that any of this diminishes the accomplishment this album represents. These guys may seem on the surface to be gregarious troglodytes, but the well-constructed songs betray them - at least one person here is putting a lot of thought into these songs. Witness the arpeggiated chord progressions on "Eruption," the straight-faced doo-wop break on "I'm the One," and perhaps most improbably, the pop fingerprints smeared all over "Feel Your Love Tonight" (complete with Beatlesque falsetto "oohs"). There are few missteps here - the forgettable "Atomic Punk" and the weak fade-out ending to "On Fire" being the only two I even remotely feel like nitpicking.

Now, as for why I find the songs "surprisingly" short - it must have been tempting for someone with Eddie Van Halen's chops to bloat the guitar solos out to interminable lengths. That he resists this urge earns him bonus points from me and a 10/10 review.

Elvis Costello: My Aim is True

Artist: Elvis Costello
Title: My Aim is True
Acquired: Purchased, mid 1990s from BMG Direct
Rating: 7/10

This CD is notable for having one of the most gratuitous disclaimers I've ever seen:

"To ensure your listening pleasure a short silence separates each of the extended play sections."

I suppose that's preferable to a scream of agony separating each track, but really, what else would you expect?

Before I get to the actual content of this CD, a brief digression: What is punk? I always found it kind of strange that Elvis Costello was regarded as part of the punk rock movement early in his career. Listening to this CD, it's not the kind of music that comes to mind when I think of "punk rock". The songs are sung, not snarled or screamed, any distortion on the guitars (including pedal steel!) is minimal, and the music itself sounds downright old-fashioned. So what are we left with that's punk? Well, the lyrics do mostly stick to the narrow continuum of human emotion that ranges from anger to bitterness. And it was 1977 London, after all - if you were an artist just having his commercial breakthrough in that particular time and place, you must have darned well been punk. Plus, the album was released by the Stiff label - you know, the label that had the Damned (but also had Nick Lowe, who was about as punk as, um, Elvis Costello).

I guess the argument comes down to comparing the Elvis Costello sound to what was big on the radio at the time. Let's look at the Billboard top ten for 1977:

1) Rod Stewart - Tonight's the Night
2) Andy Gibb - I Just Want to be Your Everything
3) Emotions - Best of my Love
4) Barbra Streisand - Evergreen (Love Theme from A Star is Born)
5) Hot - Angel in Your Arms
6) Kenny Nolan - I Like Dreamin'
7) Thelma Houston - Don't Leave Me This Way
8) Rita Coolidge - (Your Love Has Lifted Me) Higher and Higher
9) Alan O'Day - Undercover Angel
10) Mary MacGregor - Torn Between Two Lovers

Now, granted this is the U.S. top ten, but that's just what I happened to have handy. Anyway, the argument could definitely be made that Elvis Costello sounds more like the Sex Pistols than any of the artists above. Ergo, Elvis Costello is punk.

No. I still don't buy it. It was a marketing device.

Anyway, on to the music itself. I can already imagine outraged Elvis Costello fans noticing that I only gave this CD 7 out of 10. How could I possibly give such a low score relative to the raves that are found elsewhere (per Wikipedia, 5/5 from Allmusic, Rolling Stone, and Sputnikmusic, and a 9.8/10.0 from Pitchfork Media)?

Well, having not read those reviews yet, I'm not sure why this work garnered such high ratings. I think it is a very good album, but I can very quickly think of at least five Elvis Costello albums that I prefer. If I were to give this album, say, a 10/10, that would leave me with having to give those other albums an 11, and that would be far too obvious a ripoff of This is Spinal Tap. I need to leave myself some wiggle room.

I suspect that many reviewers fell into the "first good album from a great artist" trap - the tendency is to give the breakthrough moment the highest rating, even if even greater triumphs were still to come. Anyway, I am not here today to review the reviewers, but to review My Aim is True. So, let's get on to it already.

What is good here? Well, we start out with "Welcome to the Working Week," a great opener at 1:22, at that's even with a slow introduction included. More evidence of Elvis' punkiness! Okay, I'll stop that. We also have the still-renowned "Alison" and "Watching the Detectives" (which was not on the original British release, but is on this version of the CD (and probably all versions of the CD). We also have the humorous "Mystery Dance", ironic "I'm Not Angry", and the memorable "Red Shoes". But as you progress from one number to the next number, a number of the numbers start to sound like that number you heard a couple numbers ago. And that is where the problem lies for me - at times this sounds more like a particularly outstanding demo tape than an actual commercial product - which is certainly part of its charm, but also prevents it from hitting the kind of heights that would later be hit by one Declan MacManus.

Perhaps ironically, two of the most produced and "finished" songs on here, "Radio Sweetheart" and "Stranger in the House", are not on the album proper, but in the "Extended Play" section of B-sides and demos (you know, the section with the pleasurable silences). But again, this was 1977 London, and placing these country-flavored songs onto your debut album would perhaps not have been the best possible career move.

However, it would have been a very punky thing to do.

Adam & the Ants: The Peel Sessions

So, I've got this huge CD collection, and this blog, so I decided to make my way through the collection and blog my reviews.

Artist: Adam & the Ants
Title: The Peel Sessions
Acquired: Purchased, early 1990s at the Exclusive Company on Madison's west side
Rating: 3/10

I couldn't decide which CD I wanted to review first, so I decided to grab the first CD from my alphabetically-arranged CD collection (yes, this does mean that there will be no ABBA reviews appearing on this blog).

Back in the early 1990s, the concept of a CD being "reissued" with "bonus tracks" was either not yet invented, or at least not yet prevalent. Recording artists basically had two buckets of recorded music: that which was good enough to release, and that which was not. A fan wanting to hear things from the second bucket generally had to find a place where he or she could purchase "bootleg" CDs in order to quench their completist thirst - there was no internet music trading, no youtube, and the only songs that inhabited a sort of musical gray area were non-album track B sides on singles - legitimately available, but not widely heard if, like me, you were the sort of person who bought full length albums almost exclusively.

Thus it was pretty exciting to find a CD of the Peel Sessions for Adam & the Ants for this antperson, containing not one, not two, not three, but four entire songs otherwise unavailble on CD or LP, interspersed with six other songs that had previously appeared on Dirk Wears White Sox or Kings of the Wild Frontier.

The first song, Lou, opens up pretty nice-sounding. This is music that would sound pretty good on a talk radio program coming back in from a commercial before the host starts ranting about politics or sports or whatever. Imagine how my teenage face must have fallen when the vocals kick in. This is not Adam Ant at all, but some person named "Jordan" screaming - er, make that screeching - at the top of their lungs. Pretty much ruins the song.

A little wikipedia research reveals that "Jordan" served as "a highly visible icon of the London punk subculture," in addition to briefly dating and managing Adam Ant. Nowadays, she's a veterinary nurse. What she is not, and was not, however, is a singer. And this is not coming from someone completely averse to unusual vocal techniques - but there is good screaming, and there is bad screaming. This is bad screaming.

Fortunately, the other nine tracks are sung by Adam. The recording dates predate Dirk Wears White Sox, so this is the "Jubilee"-era, black leather-clad, Adam Ant, not the pirate garb, pounding tribal drums Adam Ant. The less-interesting and -entertaining Adam Ant, in short.

Of the "unreleased" songs that show up here, we have It Doesn't Matter and Friends, which would later show up on the B Side Babies CD, and Ligotage, which to my knowledge has not shown up elsewhere. I prefer the version of It Doesn't Matter that is offered here to the version that is on B Side Babies, because the lyrics here make more sense, although they do still suck. Picking a favorite version of It Doesn't Matter, it should be noted, is akin to choosing whether one prefers elephant dung deep-fried or boiled.

I also prefer this version of Friends to the B Side Babies version. I think it benefits from the simpler arrangement presented here.

We also have songs that predate their finished state, such as Zerox (sic) without the middle section, and You're So Physical without the second verse (in its place the first verse is repeated). Compared to Dirk Wears White Sox, Zerox is slower, while Animals & Men is given a faster runthrough. All songs have many fewer overdubbed parts compared to the Dirk recordings.

Assessing the CD in whole, what you get here that's worth hearing (for only diehard Adam Ant fans) is the first few seconds of Lou, the mediocre unreleased number Ligotage, the fast version of Animals & Men, and versions of It Doesn't Matter and Friends that are arguably better than on B Side Babies. In other words, not much.

The post I wrote today on the Badgersports forum

I spent way too much time typing this post for it to be seen only by the approximately 20 people who look at the Badgersports forum (insert sarcastic remark about the approximately 2 people who read this blog). So here it is:

Ten Random, Rambling Observations/Musings:

1) Before the season, I thought the most likely record for the Badgers this year would be 5-7. They've already got the 5.

2) I've been surprised by the defense this year. I was surprised that they held North Carolina to 3 points at North Carolina. I was surprised that a defensive which lost 7 contributors on the line from the previous year PRIOR TO losing its best remaining defensive end in game three was able to not only get some pressure on opposing quarterbacks, but rank at or near the top of the Big Ten in sacks. The defensive play at Northwestern was surprising in light of the moderate success in the first five games of the year, but not so much when compared to my more modest preseason expectations.

3) Badgermaniac starting a long thread to bash Saint Bucky, then pontificating in that thread about how he is all about raising the level of discourse on his board-- irony, anyone?

4) I remain cautiously optimistic about the prospects for year one and beyond of the Bielema era. The Badgers should be no worse than pretty good next year, and could be outstanding if they can find someone in next year's WR corps who can make some plays, and if the bounces and injuries go their way.

5) RandallCamp and BadgerRoy get props for mentioning me by name in a thread over on the Badgernation board. We could use those guys over here. Can I get a couple sycophants while I'm at it? As board administrator, I think I'm entitled to a couple.

6) Went to the game with my wife. Drove down from Madison Saturday morning, and were able to buy a pair of great 35 yardline seats from a guy literally within seconds of stepping off the shuttle bus. Paid the same amount the Northwestern ticket office would have charged me for much crappier seats: $50 per ticket. I know we could have gotten in for significantly less, but I just wanted to secure the tickets quickly so we could get something to eat, and have good seats, and not have to screw around with shopping and haggling. By the way, is there a verb for "buying tickets for a scalper"? Someone needs to add to the lexicon here, so that when someone asks something like, "Where are your tickets?", you can just say "We're going to SCLEMP a pair" or whatever, rather than the lengthy "We're going to buy a pair from a scalper" or potentially-confusing "We're going to SCALP a pair".

7) But I digress. We enjoyed our visit to Northwestern on the whole, though it obviously falls short of the kind of experience you can get in Columbus, Madison, or Happy Valley. Walked through the campus, saw a little of downtown (had supper at Chili's, which we both like, since it was across from where we parked). Didn't have a lot of time since I had to be back in Grinnell by Sunday morning, but got a little bit of the flavor. Not much of a bar scene from what I hear, but neither of us are into bars (well, maybe sports bars a little), so that was no big loss. Plenty of interesting shopping in downtown Evanston. Only regret was that the long line at Mustard's Last Stand persuaded us to just get lunch from a guy with a hot dog cart, so we missed out on that critical component of the Northwestern experience (I usually make an effort to partake in the renowned gastronomical options of the various Big Ten venues, such as the Penn State Creamery, or the Thurman Cafe's Thurmanburger in Columbus, which actually isn't really near the stadium, and didn't work out for us anyway when we visited last year, since the grill was broken that day). But I digress again.

8) At this point, I'd love to post a bunch of pictures I took Saturday capturing the Northwestern experience, but since neither of us brought a camera on the trip, that won't be possible. You'll just have to go and see for yourself.

9) When the Badgers played there in 2003, I thought about going, but decided not to because I figured they'd just lose anyway. Great decision, but then they lose the 2005 game anyway. At least it wasn't a total turkey of a game like the one in 2003. In fact, it was very nearly one of the epic victories, sure to be remembered for generations. Darned interception! Oh well.

10) Only Big Ten road venue remaining on my list is Purdue. Maybe I'll make it out to West LaFayette next year to complete the circuit. It would also be nice to attend Badger wins at Michigan, Illinois, and (DAMMIT) Northwestern, so maybe I'll go back to those places someday.

11) Hope this helps, RedWagon.

Posted seperately, here are my updated Big Ten road trip rankings:

1. OSU (2004)
2. PSU (2003)
3. MSU (2000)
4. Iowa (1998, 2002)
5. Michigan (1998)
6. Northwestern (2005)
T7. Illinois (2001)
T7. Indiana (1998)
9. Minnesota (1993, 1999)
NR: Wisconsin (bias) and Purdue (haven't been there).

Wisconsin's road game record for games I've attended is now 6-5, with a losing streak of 1.

Archives: It's not just a Math Team, it's an experience

Here's an excerpt from my "autobiography" (sure to be published any day now):

I continued to participate in the Math Team my final year at Memorial. The senior class that year had outstanding depth. Mike Hanson, Josh Goldfoot, Rich Dubielzig, Jim Argraves and I comprised the main competition for the four senior slots on the first team.

That was also the year that the Math Team became more than just another academic team. Rich and I conspired to turn Memorial’s Math Team into a way of life. It started out fairly small, more idea than execution, but almost before I realized what had happened, we had assumed all the trappings of a Varsity Athletic Team. I think it all started with the Official Math Team Cheer, as created by Ryan Braun and his cronies:

Hit ‘em with the stick, the stick
The Big Memorial Figurative Stick
What’s that stick stand for?
Spirit
Power
Pride
And Death
To you you you you you
To who?
To you you you you you

From there, everything sort of snowballed. Rich soon created the physical embodiment of the formerly figurative Stick by painting a two-by-four white, then painting on it in green “Spirit Power Pride” on one side, and “Death” on the other. At one particularly memorable away meet, Rich made his way up to a balcony with the stick, and enthusiastically led those of us on the team who had little shame in the cheer, swinging the two-by-four so fanatically that I feared it would fly out of his hands and injure someone in the mob below. The collective vibe generated by this display was never seen before or again at any Math Meet... the Memorial Team was yelling the cheer, most of the other students were booing or throwing things at Rich... it was an incredible sight.

That fall, Memorial’s Math Team became a slavering beast that was nearly out of control with school spirit, or perhaps a parody thereof. Somehow, Rich managed to convince several girls we knew (all juniors and seniors as I recall) to become Math Team Cheerleaders, probably the first time in the history of Math Teams that a team had its own cheerleaders. They even custom-made their outfits; green and white pleated skirts with various Greek letters and mathematical symbols on them. At about the same time, the Math Team acquired their own official team jerseys (subsidized by the Academic Booster Club... talk about Math imitating Athletics!). The design was surprisingly restrained, probably as a result of it having been designed by the generally restrained Mike Hanson. The jerseys were plain white T-shirts with “JMM Varsity Math” printed on the front, in the shirt-pocket area (or more specifically, what would have been the shirt-pocket area if the shirts had had pockets, which they didn’t), and a quote from George Orwell’s 1984 (which I had picked out) on the back: “Four, five, six - in all honesty I don’t know.”

Perhaps because the jerseys were so understated, Rich and I felt a need to put our last names and numbers on the back of ours, in the style of athletic jerseys. Well, sort of in the style of athletic jerseys, anyway. Rather than go with cliché numbers like “14” and “27”, we chose mathematical expressions that evaluated to a certain number. For example, the back of my jersey featured a complicated formula which evaluates to one.

In order to get my last name and number on my jersey, I had to make a stencil, which I spent a considerable amount of time (basically, an entire evening) doing. Other Math Team members who made stencils for their jerseys were Rich, Josh, and B.J. Gallenberg, who we convinced to use “ln 0” as his number. Josh used the decidedly elegant e^(pi*i). Rich also made a stencil for Vic Levine, our coach and Calculus teacher, that simply said “COACH.” Various other Math Team members bought jerseys, but decided to keep them plain (wisely, as it turned out).

After the stencils had been made, Rich and I took our jerseys and two cans of spray paint (one black, one green... I chose green for my jersey) to an office tucked away somewhere in the back of Memorial’s hallowed halls. We were debating how to achieve the best results when the surprisingly headstrong (almost kamikaze) Josh barged in, and with no hesitation whatsoever, slapped his stencil on his jersey, grabbed a can of paint, and sprayed away.

The first thing that we noticed was that spray paint doesn’t just go where you aim the can, it kind of drifts and bounces all over the place. The next thing we noticed, after Josh lifted his stencil from his jersey, was that Josh’s spraying method did not produce great results. There was a pronounced paint outline where the borders of his stencil had been. Rich and I grabbed some newspapers to lay at the edges of our stencils so we wouldn’t face the same problem.

The next jersey to be defaced was Mr. Levine’s. This time we were more careful; we put newspapers on the areas of the shirt that the stencil didn’t cover before spraying it. Rich did the spraying. As he slowly lifted the stencil so only he could see the results, I hesitantly asked him, “Is it better than Josh’s?”

Rich’s morose reply was simultaneously pathetic and hilarious: “It’s not as bad as Josh’s, but it’s bad enough to be ashamed.” A look at the jersey confirmed for me that we hadn’t chosen the best possible method to adorn our garments. We had still manged to get paint in places where it didn’t belong, and the outline of the lettering wasn’t very sharp.

Next, Rich and I painted our own jerseys with fairly mediocre results (although ours did turn out better than Josh’s or Mr. Levine’s).

Finally, B.J. Gallenberg arrived, and after being advised of our previous errors, spray painted through his stencil for a much longer time than Rich and I had with the previous shirts. When he was done, we could see a beautiful, dark, legible “ln 0” on his jersey through the stencil. I felt a momentary pang of envy. His jersey looked good. Then he lifted the stencil, and we had a good laugh at his expense. The paint had so thoroughly soaked the jersey that it had spread out under the stencil, and his number was actually completely illegible, little more than two large blobs of green paint.

The discouragement over our jerseys didn’t prevent further activity on other new fronts for Rich, me, and the Math Team. For our next gimmick, Rich and I made a gigantic Math Team poster and hung it in Memorial’s cafeteria. Rich had to argue a bit with the teacher who was in possession of the giant markers that are necessary for such an effort (something about them only being for use by cheerleaders for athletic teams), but after some haggling, he were able to secure the necessary equipment. Rich wanted the posters to proclaim, “JMM Varsity Math: We’ll Squeeze Their Cheese,” but I vociferously vetoed that idea. Finally we agreed upon a slogan that would promise victory over Memorial’s #1 rival, evil West High, the only school to offer our team decent competition each year (but ultimately, perennially placing #2 in the city to the always victorious Spartans). A little advance explanation here: West’s team had named themselves The Oinkers (I have no idea why). With this in mind, we wrote on the poster in two-foot-high letters, “JMM Varsity Math Brings Home The Bacon,” then for the sake of those ignorant non-Math Teamers in the school, added “(Beats West)” at the bottom.

To add the final glorious piece to the Math Team puzzle, Rich and I composed a “Math Team Fight Song” that spring. I suggested we begin the song with the line “We are the indefatigable Math Team,” but quickly changed my mind, believing it to be too rhythmically awkward. However, Rich very quickly came up with an appropriate rhythm, as well as the next three lines, so we retained my opening line. Before long, the Math Team had its own official fight song. The lyrics incorporate some of the Official Math Team Cheer, and are as follows:

Math Team Fight Song (Conners/Dubielzig)

We are the indefatigable Math Team
Proudly showing off our green and white
Glad that we are Memorial Spartans
Boldly charging forth into the fight
Our teams are so mathematically perfect
Solving every problem sent their way
Understanding the concepts
Knowing all of the formulas
Math Team, we’ll go all the way

Spirit
Power
Pride
And Death
To you you you you you
To who?
To you you you you you

(Repeat verse)

After the first meet, things looked less rosy for the Math Team than they had in previous years. Rather than dominating, Memorial’s First Team (of which I was a member) took second place at the meet (see article from The Independent, V.1 N.4). Many teams might have been happy to take second, but for Memorial, it was a direct slap in the face. Adding to our distress, West’s First Team had taken first place. My respectable 5th place individual finish at the meet was not enough to secure a team victory.

Unfortunately, things did not immediately perk up for the Math Team. The second meet of the year, which was to have been held December 4, was canceled due to a teacher slowdown. No more math meets were held until the spring semester.

Finally, on January 29, we had our chance for revenge. This time, at a meet held at East High, Memorial rose to the challenge, as the first team took first place out of the 54 teams in attendance. Perhaps not coincidentally, this meet also featured the debut of the Math Team Cheerleaders.

Throughout the spring, the Math Team Cheerleaders did their best to keep our spirits high. They actually traveled to local meets with the team (many of them were actually on the Math Team itself), and wrote and performed several cheers. The cheerleaders courageously continued to cheer through fierce heckling from other jealous teams that were cheerleaderless. Although they were left out of the yearbook that year, those who didn’t graduate continued to cheer on the Math Team the following year and won their rightful place in the 1992-1993 Memorial Yearbook.

At the third meet of the year, held March 18 at rival West High, Memorial again emerged from the field victorious, capturing first place (see article from The Independent, V.1 N.8).
The Memorial Math Team finished out the year strong, winning the district title for an amazing seventh straight year. The team also placed an excellent, if slightly disappointing seventh at the state meet.

It was the last meet of the season, held after the state meet due to the earlier teacher slowdown, at which we noticed that we had started a small trend: West’s team had followed our lead, acquiring jerseys of their own. Luckily for the safety of all involved, they never got their own cheerleaders. You don’t want to be around when two rival sets of Math Team Cheerleaders meet.



Related articles:

Independent, V.1 N.4, 27 November 1991
Math team takes second at first meet
By Rich Dubielzig

Memorial’s varsity math team lost to Madison West by an agonizing four points at the October 16 Madison LaFollette math meet. Despite this close loss, the Spartans are hoping to make it to their seventh consecutive state tournament.

“We have a large supply of talent this year, and it looks like we’re really gonna kick some butt,” said enthusiastic team #1 member senior Ryan Conners. “This year, we also have our own cheerleaders and T-shirts. That kicks too,” said Conners.

“Coming out of the first event we were looking pretty good. But then we faced the mother of all mental math problems, and things went downhill,” said varsity team member senior Josh Goldfoot.

This statement reflects some of the disappointment felt at Memorial’s torturously close 231-235 loss to arch-rival West at the recent meet at LaFollette. Although varsity team #1 had more of its members ranked in the top five, including a perfect score of 30 by senior Mike Hanson, West’s team had a greater average score, therefore winning the meet. Memorial’s loss was due in part to the extremely difficult mental math event that is characteristic of the first meet of the season.

Although the math team cheerleaders were unable to appear at the LaFollette meet, they will be making their debut at the December 4 meet at Memorial. “I think that it’ll make [the math team] feel better, because, as far as I know, we’re the only [academic] cheerleaders in the state,” said math team cheerleader Sarah McLain.



Sword & Shield, V. 25 N.5, 6 February 1992
Math team wins
By Warren Chang

The Memorial Math Team showed its strength at the January 29th meet at East High School. The team rebounded from its defeat at the hands of West to beat the Regent team by more than thirty points. The other Memorial Varsity team took third place after West.

Top scorers in this meet were Mike Hanson and Jim Argraves, who both turned in perfect papers, Wilson Tai, Ryan Conners, and Josh Goldfoot. The Junior Varsity team also took first place over the West team. Top scorers for JV were Jason Lowden, Mike Ferris, and Christine Hauptly.

This meet marked the debut of the Memorial Math Team cheerleaders, which made quite an impression both on the Memorial teams and the teams from other schools. The highlight of their performance was Math Team student council leader Rich Dubielzig leading the team in the “stick” chant, which attracted much attention.



Independent, V.1 N.8, 1 April 1992
Math teams take first at regional
By Carolyn Lorenz

Memorial math teams took first at both the varsity and juior varsity level, and the JV #2 team placed fifth at the third regional math meet of the year on March 18. Teams from all over southwestern Wisconsin competed at the meet at West.

The varsity problems were probably the hardest of the year. There were several difficult problems which very few people answered correctly. The highest individual score was a twenty-one out of thirty from West’s Aaron Mandel, and the winning JMM Varsity #1 had a combined total of only 127 points. Team member Mike Hanson placed second individually with his score of 20. Varsity #2 did not place at this meet.

The junior varsity tests were of average difficulty. The winning Memorial JV team #1 received a combined total of 226 points, including the perfect 30 points brought in by sophomore Mike Ferris. Ferris unofficially placed first individually at the meet. JV #2 placed fifth overall.

The math team was cheered along by dedicated math team cheerleaders. At both meets, cheerleaders were pelted with paper balls and pencils while they attempted to do their cheers. But they also received positive comments from students at other schools who felt they were setting a good example.

The Varsity #1 team took first place overall on January 29 at Madison East, while JV #1 placed second. The Varsity #2 team placed third while West’s Team #1 placed first in the JV division.

Spartan mathematicians competed in the State meet on March 28. Seniors Hanson, Ryan Braun, Ryan Conners, Rich Dubielzig, and juniors Wilson Tai, Jessica Forbess, Adam Resnick, and sophomore Warren Chang will be competing. Due to the teacher slowdown, the meet originally scheduled for December at Memorial was put off until after the State meet.

New Badger Sports Board

For those who didn't see the post on badgernation, and who are interested in such things, here is the post I wrote containing the url for the new Badgersports board:

Quote:
I'm all for having this board and another one where I can cuss and swear and yell, but I don't
want all boards to be chaos.

As you wish.

Now that I'm no longer posting here, I had time to set up another badger board. It's on one of those free message board services. Key features are:

No popus or pop-unders
Unlimited bandwidth for free
The ability to set up polls

Registration is required, but very quick and easy. Here is the url:

http://badgersports.myfreeforum.org

Here are the posting rules and regulations as set forth by myfreeforum.org:

You may not:
- Post links to sites where material can be illegally downloaded
- Post pornographic material or links (sorry Chime)
- Make posts containing Racism, Homophobia, or Religious hate.

I will act as moderator of the site until it either thrives or dies. If it thrives, the community will democratically elect my successor, who will serve a term of one year. If it dies, the community won't have to. Actually, if it dies, there will be no community to speak of.

This board is not intended as competition for the badgernation forum, just as an alternative. You are welcome and encouraged to continue reading and/or posting on badgernation if you wish. You are not burning any bridges by posting on the new board, as far as I know. You may decide, for example, to post basketball-related stuff on badgernation, post football-related stuff on rivals, and post off-topic poll questions on the new board. That would be perfectly fine with me, and I don't see why anyone else would have a problem with it either.

My life: I have a lot of e-mail

Wow, thanks for the kind wishes badgermaniacs. I didn't check my e-mail all afternoon, then when I finally did late this evening, it contained a plethora of blog comments. Well, six actually, but compared to what I was expecting, that's a plethora. I guess the link I posted on the badgerboard must have stayed up for at least a little while.

I want to take this opportunity to formally apologize to AirRaley for getting a little snippy with him last week. We may not see eye to eye on much politically Air, but you're a class act. I will do my best to behave with more decorum on the next Badgersports board, which should be coming along any day now.

If anyone reading this knows the address where this Saturday's tailgate is, please post it here or e-mail me. I guess I need to know what time it's happening too. First game of the season for me. Maybe I can get a few shifts in on the defensive line.

Badgers: Football team to play Michigan Saturday

NFL: Ron Dayne resurfaces in Denver

A nice cameo performance by former Badger running back Ron Dayne today helped the Denver Broncos pull out a home win vs. the San Diego Chargers. Dayne had carried the ball just twice in the Broncos' first seven quarters of play this year, then was inserted a few plays into Denver's game-winning field goal drive, and ran six times for 39 yards. The story here:

http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/recap?gameId=250918007

Some Denver fans are already calling for Dayne to start next week, as first-string running back Mike Anderson, perhaps slowed by injury, was ineffective. I doubt Dayne will start, unless Anderson remains significantly less than 100% for next week's game, but I'm hopeful he will see more action.

Now in his sixth NFL season, Dayne needed a change of scenery after wearing out his welcome in New York (largely due to the inept and unlamented Giants coach Jim Fassel, who finally was shown the door after the 2003 season). After fighting his way through a crowded Denver backfield in the preseason, he appears to be in the perfect offense, and the perfect situation, to rejuvenate an NFL career that was in jeopardy of reaching a premature conclusion.

The play-by-play from Denver's winning drive:

1st and 10 at DEN 20 (5:21) J.Plummer pass incomplete to A.Lelie.
2nd and 10 at DEN 20 (5:14) J.Plummer pass to C.Adams to DEN 28 for 8 yards (D.Florence).
3rd and 2 at DEN 28 (4:34) M.Anderson up the middle to DEN 30 for 2 yards (D.Edwards).

1st and 10 at DEN 30 (3:52) J.Plummer pass incomplete to C.Adams.
PENALTY on SD-Q.Jammer, Defensive Pass Interference, 4 yards, enforced at DEN 30 - No Play.

1st and 10 at DEN 34 (3:48) R.Dayne left tackle to DEN 47 for 13 yards (T.Kiel).

1st and 10 at DEN 47 (3:12) R.Dayne left tackle to SD 45 for 8 yards (D.Scott).
2nd and 2 at SD 45 (2:35) R.Dayne right guard to SD 42 for 3 yards (R.Godfrey).

1st and 10 at SD 42 (2:00) J.Plummer pass incomplete to R.Smith.
2nd and 10 at SD 42 (1:52) R.Dayne left guard to SD 37 for 5 yards (R.Godfrey).
PENALTY on SD-B.Leber, Defensive Offside, 5 yards, enforced at SD 42 - No Play.
2nd and 5 at SD 37 (1:47) R.Dayne right guard to SD 34 for 3 yards (T.Kiel).
3rd and 2 at SD 34 (1:02) R.Dayne left tackle to SD 33 for 1 yard (B.Leber).
4th and 1 at SD 33 (:57) R.Dayne left end to SD 23 for 10 yards (S.Foley).

1st and 10 at SD 23 (:10) J.Plummer pass incomplete.
2nd and 10 at SD 23 (:09) J.Elam 41 yard field goal is GOOD, Center-M.Leach, Holder-T.Sauerbrun.

DRIVE TOTALS: SD 17 DEN 20, 12 plays, 57 yards, 2 penalties, 5:16 drive, 14:55 elapsed

Politics: Bush: No new taxes needed to pay for recovery

Okay, so the president says that no new taxes are needed to restore NOLA: http://www.cnn.com/2005/POLITICS/09/16/bush.main/index.html

A couple points in the article:
1) The costs of reconstruction will likely be over $200 billion.
2) Bush says that we can pay for reconstruction by "cut(ting) unnecessary spending."
3) The 2005 and 2006 budget deficits are both estimated at over $300 billion.

So, this guy has been in office for five years, with his own political party controlling the house, senate, and judiciary for most of that time, and there's $200 billion or more in "unnecessary spending" which hasn't been cut from the budget yet? This with a $300 billion deficit, and the (ostensibly) fiscally conservative party in power?

For the shrinking group of people out there who don't realize it yet, a simple observation: The Republicans are fiscally conservative like Bill Clinton is monogamous.

A new receptacle for my random thoughts

So, why a blog?

Just wanted a place where I could post my thoughts on whatever I want, where I could be free to disagree with whoever I want, without having to worry about being censored by anyone other than myself.

A place where I can post my opinion, so I can come back to it in a couple years and marvel at how wrong I used to be.

A place where I can provide regular updates to my family and friends on my life-- nothing interesting this week.

Will anyone read this? Does it matter whether anyone reads this?

Not sure yet where this is going. Will I be trying to entertain others, or just myself?

That's all I can think of for now.